After a stress-filled week at work, relieved was the only feeling I had. As I left work, I suddenly remembered that a close relative of mine had asked me to have dinner with him. I glanced at my watch and realized that I was going to arrive late. When I arrived at the meeting point, he was waiting impatiently.
"Sorry I'm late." I thought about giving an excuse for my tardiness but refrained from doing so after I figured that saying something may make him wonder if I wanted to see him in the first place.
"That's all right. I'm sure you are busy at work."
It appeared that he did not mind me being late, but his facial expressions told me otherwise. How can I blame him? I promised him I would arrive on time but I broke the pledge.
We began to walk and he asked "so which place should we go to?"
Almost by reflex, I muttered "Hmm..."
"Looks like you are not quite sure where you would like to eat. All right. How about we go to the place we went to the last time we were here?"
I wondered if I had visited the place recently. After figuring out that I had not, I nodded and said "all right."
The noisy street meant that even if we tried to converse, the noises around us would surely drown our voices out. So we did not say anything on our way to the restaurant.
After we had taken our seat and made our order, he asked "so how was your day?"
Why do people always have to ask this question? Not many people will answer this question honestly, I thought to myself. Of course, it is impolite to say that out loud. So I responded by saying that the day was little different from any other day at the office.
"So what is a typical day like for you?"
I was sure I answered exactly the same question the last time we met, and our meeting before that, and the one before that. Perhaps he had forgotten again, or that he liked to ask this question incessantly. I told him what my work was like in brief. I almost wanted to tell him that the nature of my work remained the same since our last meeting and that the answer I give would be the same one I gave the last time.
I asked him what he had been up to lately and his answer was very similar to the one he gave in our last meeting, although I was not sure if he knows about it. There was a period of silence afterwards.
The next words that came out of his mouth were "it seems that I am the only one who has initiated a conversation. Had it not for me we would be like two strangers sharing the table. Do you realize that you are being selfish here? Why can't you care more about what people close to you are thinking or doing? You can't just think about what's in your mind."
We did not have much common interest, so we rarely had lengthy conversations when we meet. However, it seemed that his frustration had been building for a while. While his last comment was correct, it was difficult to respond — an honest answer makes him think that I am uncaring; and I can't give another answer with a straight face. So for the next moment, my mouth remained shut.
When I finally opened my mouth, I stammered and my mouth, appeared to be acting on its own, blurted a few words. From his facial expression, he seemed to be more disappointed.
"You have been like this for a long time. Why can't learn how to express yourself better? Why can't you be more open?" he asked.
I dislike people asking me personal questions, and I usually stammer when those questions are raised. I did not like to know too much about someone else, either. I put that thought in my reply and all he uttered was "I see."
For the rest of the night, we made a few short exchanges, usually one asked a question and the other answered without any further query.
As we walked out of the restaurant, we waved goodbye to each other. After that we went our separate ways. On my way home one thought remained in my head —perhaps saying "I am not very good at talking, but I am willing to listen" may have eased the tension. Of course, that is what I think and others may not feel the same way.