I don't like to get political in this column, but something that happened last week really made me laugh. I don't know where it is written, but I'm now very sure that there is an article in the B.C. Constitution that states that the Premiers of the province have to run into trouble while in office. How else can you explain the records of the recent Premiers?
What? What is it? Oh right! You are not here to read these ramblings. Very well then, I now give you what you are here for.
Mobile phones have become a necessity for many people today. No matter where you go you can see someone holding a phone. Compared to what mobile phones were like in the 80's, the ones we have now are very compact. Of course, with every trend, there are people who go against the flow. The following might be the biggest mobile phone you'll ever see. A man was arrested in North Vancouver (BC, of course) for stealing a truck. After examining the contents in the back of the truck, the police realized that the truck was not the only thing that was stolen. The other thing turned out to be a phone booth. It shows that there is still hope for us all. After all, it seems that most criminals don't think very carefully before committing their crimes.
Many children are fascinated by trains. There are a large number of people who dream of building a sophisticated train network in their youth and some spend a large fortune to live that dream. Very often, kids act very enthusiastically whenever they get to ride a train. It seems that many adults still have that feeling. The first phase of the New Dehli subway opened recently and people rode in it in droves. Many curious riders rode for hours aimlessly. The supply of tokens that act as passes ran out because the riders took them as souvenirs. Also, the emergency intercom had to be disconnected because the riders continuously used it to ask the driver to drive faster. One may ridicule the people for being simple-minded, but in these days where everything is so hectic, it is good to let your inner child out sometimes. (Note: The author of this column does not condone any non-emergency use of emergency intercom or theft of train tokens.)
It appears that many small towns are resorting to unusual means to garner the media's (and my) attention. You have read about towns fighting for the right to be a ghost town and organizations urging towns to change names. I thought I have seen it all. Once again, I was wrong. The town of Bridgeville, California (why do all of the weird ideas originate from there?) was put on auction at eBay. The bid started modest enough — $5000 US. Then bids began to pour in as Christmas approached. When the gavel was pounded, it was priced at $1.78 million US. The lot included a few buildings and a tractor, but not the bridge or the school. There also was no mention of the reactions of the 670 or so residents of the town. It might be fun to own a town, but one's enjoyment might be very limited. After all, there's only has a tractor to play with, and there is no power to wield at all. It just shows that one's IQ and wealth are not correlated at all.
There are many bad drivers on the road (any of you who drive can attest to that). Very often when people drive recklessly, they make up funny (and often hard to believe) excuses. Rarely does the blame go to some extra-terrestrial. Recently a French man drove through a police road block on a French highway and set off a police chase. The chase ended when the man who ran the road block crashed his car. When he got off the car, he claimed that he ran the road block because he was being chased by Martians. He passed the breathalyzer test, but hasn't been tested for drugs or psychiatric problems yet. A person's imagination is a very powerful tool and many great advances are probably made as a result of people's imagination. However, one should not blame their wrongdoings on the "voices" in their heads.
Jason "the Screamer" Lau
Am I wasting my life by writing this column?