On July 10, the Mexico City Aztecs defeated the Havana Pipers in Game 9 of the Stanley Cup Final to win the coveted trophy. The Aztecs were the sixth Mexican team to hoist the mug in the past decade. In fact, no Canadian team has won it all in the past 38 years. Hockey's popularity in Canada has fallen dramatically ever since the Leafs bought out the remaining 3 Canadian teams in 2025 (the Calgary Flames moved to Waco, Texas in 2013 and the Ottawa Senators were dissolved by Prime Minister Alexei Yashin in 2021). This year is the first time in 7 years that the Stanley Cup Final was completed before July 15. In 2026, the hockey season didn't end until August 3 due to the month-long Olympic break. The winner of the Hart and the Conn Smithe Trophies, Omar Anbardu of Egypt, earned a whopping $120 million the past year. Some claim that a player can earn $300 million a year by the end of the decade, but NHL commissioner Eric Lindros, he with 20 concussions, said that salary is under control. "We are in good shape. After all, we survived the labour stoppage of 2004, 2010, and the one from 2018 to 2021," he said. He also said there will be plans of expanding the 80-team league to the moon.
Super Bowl LXV was held in Orbito Field (the former international space station) for the first time ever and it was a resounding success. Riots before and after the game were almost non-existent and all 500,000 fans in attendance enjoyed the experience. The stadium was state of the art and the half-time show, performed by the ageless Tom Jones (he's ageless because no one knows how old he is anymore), was magnificent. The New York Giant Jets defeated the Texan Cowboys to capture the trophy. Afterwards the co-owners of the Texan Cowboys, the heads of Jerry Jones and Ross Perot had a fight and announced that the team will be split in two, like it was before 2016. Vince McMahon's attempt to start a winter football league failed once again. The XXXFL, which inserted elements such as random force fields on the goal line, random placement of land mines, and a giant fan that blows a field goal to or away from the goal, folded after 5 weeks. "Uh, I was expecting something a little different of the triple-XFL," said one fan. Only the McMahon family was in attendance of the final game.
Canada has recently won their 3rd consecutive Copa America, the South American football/soccer championship. The Canucks clobbered Argentina 4-0 in the championship game. This came on the heels of Canadian triumph in the World Cups in 2026 and 2030, defeating France in both occasions. The country's fortunes improved ever since Tomas Radzinski decided to rejoin the Canadian national squad in 2004. The hiring of Craig Forrest as manager in 2009 also paid dividends as the Canadian team advanced to the World Cup semi-finals, only to be defeated by then 3-time defending champion France. The French run finally ended in 2018, when they were defeated by African champion South Africa. Today the flying Frenchmen remains to be a force to be reckoned with and they are the early favourite to win Euro '32.
On the heels of the Laker's 7th consecutive title and its 14th in the past 17 years, NBA commissioner Mark Cuban split the Lakers into 2 teams in 2016. Although Vince Carter led the Raptors to 6 finals appearances, the team only managed to win the title twice before his retirement in 2017. The Lakers were a shadow of its former self as the team can only trade with the Clippers and all the free agents the Lakers sign have to be players that have played for the Clippers the previous year. The Grizzles have truly became the Nomads of the NBA — the team moved from Vancouver to Memphis in 2001, to Anchorage in 2008, to Spokane, Wash. in 2018, and to its current location, St. John's, Nfld. in 2027. Every move was caused by dismal attendance. The team threatened to fold if it were to be moved once more.
There were no news on the baseball front as the Major League baseball has locked out the players for the past 5 years. This labour dispute began when the commissioner cried foul over the trade between the A's and the Yankees in which the New York club traded $5 billion to the city of Oakland for the entire Athletics team. Yankee owner George Steinbrenner said that the Yankees did nothing wrong in buying out a team and raising the salaries of the players of the bought-out team. He said, "every player deserves to be paid more than $25 million a year."
FIA, the governing body of auto racing, announced earlier this week that all remaining races of this calendar year will be cancelled. This came on the heels of the shocking event that took place in the badly-maintained Silverstone raceway in which an 8-year-old boy won the British GP. Earlier in the month a 9-year-old girl claimed the checked flag in an event in Italy. Neither had ever driven a moped, let alone a car, before. The news shocked many racing fans, but they understand that the trend can't continue or we will see toddlers winning races by 2040.
The PGA, in its continuous attempt to maintain competitive balance in the Tour, has announced that beginning next year, all clubs in the players' golf bag have to be irons. This decision is based on the conclusion that one can hit a ball as far as 500 yards with an 8-wood. Tiger Woods had earned so much during his PGA tour that the statistician lost count. He also became the leading money winner of the Senior PGA Tour after ony one year in the tour. However, his reign as the top player in the world may be in jeopardy as one Leo Forest has just won the Grand Slam (winning all majors) last year.
In June, Torontonians were once again snubbed by the IOC as the International Olympic Committee awarded the 2038 Olympic Winter Games to Dubai, UAE. This is Toronto's seventh consecutive failed Olympic bid, during which Toronto lost the bid to Columbo, Sri Lanka; Kingston, Jamaica; and Amundsen Point in Antartica. "This is an outrage," said Mel Lastman, chairman of the Toronto bid committee since 2006, when he lost the Mayoral race to Tie Domi and the race for Premier in 2020, when Toronto became the 11th province of Canada. "It's obvious that the IOC is biased against me, and to a lesser extent, the Province of Toronto," said Mr. Lastman, "how long are they going to punish me for making that remark back in 2001?" He is also bitter that Vancouver/Whistler was awarded the Olympics in the city's first try, even though it remains the best Olympics held to date.
We have seen many surprises in the world of sport this year and there's still 5 months left in the year 2031. Nothing in sports is constant anymore. The old saying is very true today ?"the only constant is change." Expect more shocking news is the sporting world in the near future.
Jacob "the Megaphone" Lau
mathNEWS Sports Columnist